Funny Parenting Tweets – Kids can do terrible things, but parents tweet about them in funny ways. So, every week we collect funny stories from parents on Twitter to spread the joy.
“Dad, isn’t it surprising that the word chicken means an animal or some kind of food?” – my son, he’s about to do something terrible โ Average Dad (@Average_Dad1) March 29, 2021
Funny Parenting Tweets
We tried to learn 3 things to do in an emergency. Yesterday we checked him, “what would you do if you find me down and don’t wake me up?” I could see his little brain working. Finally he said, “I’ll go to the kitchen and eat whatever I want.” – ๐ฏ๐ฏ๐ฏ๐ฎ๐ฎ (@Mamaoutoforder) 2 March 28, 2.
A Gargantuan Collection Of Witty Tweets From The Funny Side Of Twitter
My 4 year old thinks “Proud Mary” was sung by Teeny Tiny and won’t ask any more questions about it โ MumInBits (@MumInBits) April 1, 2021
My youngest doesn’t sleep, when I got up to take a shower after eating I saw a biscuit floating in the bowl, I didn’t think ‘oh someone threw a biscuit in the toilet’ I thought it was done. Am I just making noise?’โ Amanda Mancino-Williams (@Manda_like_wine) March 29, 2021
Instead of going to see Godzilla vs Kong, I ask my two kids to do a project together. โ Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) April 1, 2021
Someone taught my 4 year old about April Fools Day and he thought it was a trick to throw a bowl of cereal on the floor and laugh at me โ thiethertimedaddy (@ threetimedaddy) April 1, 2021
Hilarious Parenting Tweets From The Dumpster Fire That Is 2018
The best part of being a parent is waking up a four year old at 3am because they want to know if she’s up โ Lowo Mama Tho (@mom_tho) March 31, 2021
Parents’ stories often offer the most obvious advice: “Trouble getting your kids up in the morning? Put them to bed early.” Give me something new like “Save money on an air conditioner. We like this one with a built-in water filter, available on Amazon for $15.99.” โ SpacedMom (@copymama) March 30, 2021
My son just pointed to the em dash in his book and said “what’s that?” and WHEN WE GO I’ve been preparing for this moment my whole life โ Melissa Bowers (@MelissaBowers_) March 31, 2021
Make cupcakes and change the lyrics to that song “Why don’t you meet me at the counter” because being a boy is more than wearing shorts and white sneakers.โ Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 27, 2021
See The 21 Funniest Parents On Social Media This Week
11 he had the cutest smile and when I asked him what was funny all he could say was “your face” in case someone is waiting for those precious moments that make parenting worthwhile. โ NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) March 29, 2021
Do not argue with them; vent your frustrations with making a sandwich on top bread.โ Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) March 31, 2021
What other people’s kids say when they sleep in bunk beds: “I call it the top bunk!” What my kids say: “It’s over, Anakin! I’ve got a higher ground.” โ James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 30, 2021
Me: how is your leg friend? 4: It still hurts. Me: what’s going on? 4: Maybe donuts? We must try otherwise we will never know. This kid gets it. โ Momsense Ensues (@momsense_ensues) March 28, 2021
See The 30 Funniest Parents On Social Media This Week
The thing about being a parent of small children is that you can’t be 100% perfect without doubting that your toothbrush didn’t go down the toilet. โ Anecdotal Birthcontrol (@AnecdtlBrthCtrl) April 2, 2021
I Love Pony by Ginuwine. For me that song can set the mood. My 5 year old son even heard it on the radio and said the intro sounded like gas. Children are sexually abused in many ways.โ A Bearer Of Dad News๐ฌ๐พ (@HomeWithPeanut) March 27, 2021
Me: you have to eat beans little boy: how many bites? me: how are you at 5? Child: 5?! how are you 3 me: how are you at 5? children: how are you 4? me: how are you at 5? Miss: how are you 6? me: ride rough weather โ Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) March 29, 2021
My three-year-old drew a picture of this family without his brother because he was upset with him. You have a strong fitness game.โ Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) March 30, 2021
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I take solace in the fact that my 10-month-old has the physical strength of a 15-year-old and is only connected to crying and will one day reward me with his true Highlander form โ amil (@amil) March 31, 2021
4: mom I want to hear that beautiful song May: … 4: MY SONG: …Alanis Morissette didn’t invite you? 4: YESโ MichiMama ๐ (@michimama75) April 2, 2021
Mom likes to know the exact location of everything in the house except when her keys are in her purse. โ mark (@TheCatWhisperer) March 31, 2021
Our neighbor baked cookies and brought them to us. My wife and I didn’t tell the kids about them and just ate a little. It’s like an unspoken connection, and it’s like we’re falling in love again. โ lilswizzy (@MotherPlaylist) March 31, 2021
Hilarious Tweets From Parents This Month That Will Make You Laugh Out
Funny tweets from parents this week. Funny tweets from parents this week. Funny tweets from parents this week
My Beloved Son Died 4 Years Ago. This Hole In My Soul Is Like Life.
By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you agree to allow us to send you certain marketing information about us and our marketing partners. . You also agree to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. But when you travel with children, even a small vacation can be a disaster, and the subject of a funny tweet.
Did you walk an hour to teach your favorite child who left their shoes at home or find some…interesting…things in your child’s google search history this week, it’s time to laugh.
Tweet Roundup: The 13 Funniest Tweets About Parenting A Sick Kid
We’ve rounded up the funniest moms and dads on social media, because we’re all in this together and laughing might be the only way we survive.
I gave my wife a lavender scented soap while she was doing the dishes, her reaction confirmed that lavender does not have a cooling effect โ Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) April 12, 2021
I prayed for peace and quiet as we left the house to go to the beach, and I was surprised that the kids didn’t say anything during the hour drive. Then, as we pulled into the parking lot, my son broke the silence: “Where are my shoes?” Parents, be careful what you wish for. โ Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) April 12, 2021
Once upon a time I was desperate for something and a global pandemic destroyed it. โ Darlin’ Darla (@Darlainky) April 13, 2021
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I just tell my 6-year-old that “you control the nightmares; they don’t control you,” which sounds like a lie because she and her sister have been controlling me since my abdominal muscles split. and they took away my weekends. โ Arianna Bradford (@thearibradford) April 8, 2021
We have three children between the ages of 4 and 14, but my husband recently learned that we have to feed them lunch every day. โ Anna (@AnnaDoesntWant2) April 8, 2021
I thought I had appendicitis, then I realized: I’m wearing my pants and belt. โ Reese Witherspoon (@ReeseW) April 9, 2021
I can’t stop laughing that my dog โโis friends with a dog named Larry. โ YourFavBlackAuntie (@greendoondoon) April 13, 2021
Parenting Tweets From 2020 That Made Us Giggle
Looks like it’s time to tell my son that I get a weekly report of what he googles. โ Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) April 12, 2021
I’m a grown woman who can’t wash dishes without getting water everywhere or how to not burn the hell out of her hands and take things out of the oven โ That Mom Tho (@ mom_tho) April 13, 2021
Getting old is funny because now I start all my stories with, “Have I told you this?” โ Christina Crawford (@Xtina_Crawford) April 13, 2021
Let’s get rid of the undone photos of you where you missed a button and had the wrong knee cap. โ Rachel Sobel (@whinecheezits) April 8, 2021
Hilarious Tweets From Parents Who Can’t Wait For The Summer To Be Over
Terri Peters is the author and editor of the. He lives in a small town on the Atlantic coast of Florida with his wife and two children. When she’s not writing, she can be found at the beach or exploring Florida’s theme parks with her family. Every week, we collect the funniest tweets from moms and dads. Now that 2018 has come to an end, it’s time to highlight the funniest tweets of all.
Check out the 50 best parenting tweets of the year below, and follow Parents on Twitter for more photos.
No one is full of false hope like a parent who brings a beach chair. โ Simon Holland (@simoncholland) June 28, 2018
I ask my son what is in the box he is carrying. “chaos!” he answered. “chaos! chaos!” I know you’re trying to say “crayon,” but it’s not like you’re wrong. โ rachelle mandik (@rachelle_mandik) January 9, 2018
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I don’t watch cartoons because I’m a parent and spend all my free time trying to brush the kids
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