Happiness Limitations – We know that holiday spending is expected to increase this year. But how do couples across the US approach spending their happiest moments?
, the maker of the best-selling personal finance software in the United States, recently surveyed more than 1,000 married adults to get a picture of their holiday spending habits – and to find out if the spending is affecting their happiness in the relationship.
Happiness Limitations
Most couples (nearly 70% of those surveyed) say they agree on holiday spending levels. A few thoughts on those who do (or don’t) set spending limits:
Kara’s Collection: Living Well Within Limitations — Mundane Faithfulness
It’s time to spend – not just on others. If you splurged on something for yourself while shopping for someone else, don’t worry: almost a third (28%) of people say they spend more on themselves during the holiday season than their husbands .
One in five (21%) completely forget to get their spouse a holiday gift. However, forgetting a gift has a big impact on relationship satisfaction. Those who forgot a gift reported an 18.5% decrease in relationship satisfaction (62/100) compared to those who never did (76/100). So this holiday season, consider talking to your spouse about holiday spending plans, double-checking your list, and maybe picking up a gift for yourself while you’re at it. There are times in our lives when happiness comes easily…weddings and babies, parties and graduations. We are happy without thinking, caught up in the joy and excitement that naturally occurs with exciting events. But life is also made up of lows, and everything in between. It’s that “in between” that I’ve been thinking about a lot these past few months… the times when we’re happy, but maybe we don’t take the time to fully realize it until we have we are really sorry.
I look back on the months before Rooster and Derek died, and I realize now how wonderful things were. We were really looking forward to our spring break in Arizona, the camp was so good that we were full for the first time in decades, and life was, on the whole, peaceful. I knew how attached I was to Rooster, and I knew I would be devastated if he died. But I guess I didn’t fully appreciate how much happiness I had wrapped up in that dog. The fun of dog parks, sharing it with people every time we go to therapy visits, watching people’s faces when they see him for the first time, seeing the joy he brings to the campers every day. He was joy embodied, and his loss hit me hard. Especially given Derek’s even bigger loss just two weeks later.
And for the past 6 weeks, I’ve thought a lot about the things that make me happy, and I’ve tried really hard to focus on those things, because honestly, I’m tired of being sad. I realized that although there are many times in our lives when happiness comes easily, there are MORE times when there is quiet happiness in the everyday life around us, and we need to open our eyes to those everyday moments, especially when that we are facing. with the great sadness that life can throw at us.
How To Find Happiness When You’re Suffering
, Michael Thompson talks about 8 things parents can’t do for their children, the first thing is to “make them happy.” And we want…gosh, we want to make them happy. But happiness is something they have to find for themselves. I have thought a lot about this with our children when we talk about the events that happen in their daily lives. They come home from school, and sometimes they face something difficult, and when they are asked, “How was your day?” The answer is, “Bad.” But when pressed, it turned out that the rest of his day was really good, but one bad thing colored the whole day. Our children have a tendency to “all or nothing” judgment on things in their lives, and I try to help them focus on the happiness that, instead of shouting, whispers quietly around them. Just because an event in your life doesn’t go exactly, perfectly, the way you thought it would, doesn’t ruin all the good. Events and friendships are rarely perfect, but their time and efforts are still worth it. I want them to understand that life can be good even when things are hard. Derek’s death was extremely difficult for all those who loved him, but his day of service was a perfect example of goodness in the midst of adversity. I have never seen such an outpouring of support as I did that day, and I know that even the youngest children understood that day what it means to be part of the Family.
Finding happiness in the last six weeks has to be intentional. Seeking and focusing on things that make me happy. It was especially hard to go camping again and again in the spring, without Rooster. This is my new normal, and I can logically look around and see all the joy and happiness around me. But the heart is not always logical, and it is often necessary to remember that life is still good. Many things have helped me during this time. One thinks of Rooster and Derek and how freely they gave of their time and love, and the realization that I would rather do that myself. It is clear that our children are also the embodiment of all that is good in the world, and I focus a lot on them. It also helped me to focus on others during this time, rather than myself, and on the things I could do to bring joy to me as well. As much as I enjoy giving gifts at Christmas, I know that it is something that brings me true joy. Happiness may not always come quickly or easily, but I know it can be found as long as we keep going. True happiness comes from being in alignment with truth. So, let’s face the facts, ‘AI’ tools are not perfect. They constantly lose things, sometimes make wrong decisions, and generally work imperfectly. When you accept that and find ways to use such tools for use cases where appropriate, you are on your way to happiness. Let me explain.
It was 2016 and the legal AI buzz was at its peak, driven mainly at the time by companies focusing on use cases such as providing full document review in M&A due diligence, and relying mainly on natural language processing (NLP).
I was invited to a dinner at a large law firm to give a short talk on this technology. Despite the fact that many were prepared by the idea that the ‘end of lawyers’ was near and the mood of the moment because of the conversation he stuck to the facts and went well, or so I thought. Then came the first question from one of the partners sitting around the table: ‘But, how can it be more accurate than a human lawyer?’ With the implication: otherwise, why use it?
As We Grow Older And Realise More Clearly The Limitations Of Human Happiness…
I replied: ‘Perhaps the real question here is whether human lawyers are as accurate as they think they are?’
He raised a few chuckles and seemed to lighten the mood. We then discuss how this technology can handle incredible amounts of data; and when managed well it’s the best way (note: this seems to complicate things for a reason I haven’t spent too much time thinking about at that point); and that the accuracy will continue to improve with practice.
And so again the discussion goes round and a lot of time and energy is spent on it. Lawyers won’t let that point go.
Looking back, it’s easy to see why things settled down to that point. At that time – and fortunately not as it is now – the debate about ‘AI’, not only in law but in all sectors of the economy, was about ‘replacement’.
Are Spending Limits The Secret To Happier Holidays?
‘We welcome our Lord AI!’, people will be joking, thinking that there will be mass unemployment by the end of the decade because of this new software. (And of course, it didn’t happen.)
Lawyers are conditioned to see this type of technology as ‘competition’. They obviously got defensive and attacked (quite rightly) the one thing that is NLP’s weakest point, which is its accuracy.
Human lawyers may not be perfect either, but this is a well-known legal technique for winning a case by destroying the opponent’s credibility.
Of course, you can mitigate much of that inaccuracy (but not all…) with multiple exercises, either preset or user-administered. But will the NLP system still miss things? Of course. The unique language and unusual documents were not in line with what NLP was trained for at the time
Happiness Is Understandable
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